Half asleep on the couch with a sleeping newborn curled up beside me. Looking down at tiny fingers in the early evening light. A quilt, pieced together by my grandma to warm my dad as a boy, now warming granddaughter and great-grandson. The sweet, milky smell of new baby. The feel of silky, dark newborn hair against my cheek. A quiet house save for the sounds of baby dreams. Long eyelashes fluttering against cheeks just starting to get chubby. A dinner lovingly prepared by a new friend who awaits the coming of her own babe. Doing nothing.
Rest. Quiet. Peace.
There is so much to do before Gram arrives to return older brothers and join us for dinner. Groceries still need to be put away. Laundry needs to be folded. The house is a disaster, and the Christmas boxes still need to be packed up for the year.
There is so much to do before this life looks like I wish. I have so far to grow in becoming a patient, loving mommy. My boys have so much to learn about being kind and loving and respectful.
My house is not how I want it to be. My life is not how I want it to be. Yesterday was terrible, full of yelling and impatience, no one happy. Today was rushed and busy.
But right now. This moment. This is where I need to be. This is perfect.