Thursday, May 7, 2009

The Night Max Wore His Wolf Suit...

...and made mischief of one kind and another, his mother called him "WILD THING," and Max said "I'LL EAT YOU UP!" so he was sent to bed without eating anything...

Calvin had a bad afternoon. It culminated in his saying something really horrible to me, words that I never want to hear coming out of his mouth again and that we absolutely do not say in our family. They were words that broke our relationship, or would have if he were older and really, truly knew what he meant. And so I sent him to bed. Without supper.

When his Daddy got home, he explained that the words he said were unacceptable, that they hurt Mommy, and that wishing Mommy were not in his life meant a lot of bad things, one of which was no mommy to feed and care for him. He is experiencing the result of his words, and so is Hobbes, who decided to see what would happen if he said the same thing.

I'm not sure what we did was right. I AM sure that they said things that I don't want to hear in our house.

Maybe a forest will grow in their room tonight...and maybe, if they are wake up in a few hours hungry they will find some supper waiting for them...but I doubt it will still be hot.

Can parenting get any lower than this?


Catherine said...

Oh, I'm so sorry. I am already dreading the day I hear something like that (although, I'm told to go away daily, and sometimes A falls to the floor screaming in agony when I walk in the room, but still...).

I think you did do the right thing - you respect your boys when you show them that their words have consequences - that shows them they are people with agency. And that they have a mother who is valuable, and a father who agrees with them.

Kudos to you. And I'm so sorry for your heart.

Tipper said...

Tough. A low point in the whole parenting thing when you hear something hurtful from you child. Wish I had some great secret parenting skill to offer you-but I don't. Nothing other than-this too shall pass. And yes you are doing the right thing-you loving your children.

evenshine said...

It will happen, and even more so were you to "let it go" at nothing. As it is, you took decisive, clear steps to ensure it won't happen just like this again. They will suck that heart out of you. But they ARE your heart, too. And hearts heal. Here's wishing yours will soon.

Daniel, Laura, Cora Marie, and Eliot said...

Testing limits and testing love. Not understanding the impact and pain that words can carry. The work of the young.
And maybe of all of us.

I know it broke your heart.

And I agree- you did the right thing.